The Alpine Dachsbracke is like a long, stubby sausage on legs, sporting a set of floppy ears that could probably double as parachutes. With a nose that could rival a bloodhound’s, this breed is essentially a mix between a detective and a couch potato, always ready to sniff out trouble or a snack. Its fur is like a patchwork quilt of browns and blacks, and it moves with the grace of a wobbly table trying to avoid a stiff breeze. Imagine a dog that could fit right into a cartoon, kind of like a clumsy mountain goat that decided to take a day off from climbing.